I am noticing that I am able to make very conscious choices as to how I behave in certain situations.
Yesterday I went to the dentists. Now if someone asked me what Hell would be for me I would say sitting in the dentist’s chair having my teeth cleaned. I find the experience violent and I use this strong word for a reason. To start with the way the hygienist suits up with mask over the lower half of their face, gloves, special goggles all ready to work on you. The instruments they use are drills and chisels. The drills have a high-pitched sound, which penetrates my head and grates on my nerves and the chisel scratches my teeth carving into them. The gel for freezing the gum tastes decidedly toxic, the television is turned to Dr Phil with subtitles dealing with child abuse and loud rock music plays in the background. All this is going on as the hygienist pokes around in my mouth jabbing, prodding, scraping, drilling and cleaning my teeth.
So I made a conscious choice (thanks partly to my recent meditation classes) I would go into my meditative state, close my eyes, breathe deeply and relax. And the amazing thing was that I was able to do this with all this violence going on around me. I willed myself not to react but instead to zone out and chill. The experience was not pleasant but I was able to keep calm and speak in a neutral tone to the hygienist when she said I needed more regular cleaning.
I made a choice to focus on my breath, soften my muscles and relax. It worked!!